Is It Fair?

Saturday, June 26, 2010

I was a bit taken back recently when I, for the first (okay, maybe second) time, was made to feel insignificant as a woman, or should I say, “being a woman.” My hubby and I needed a bid on a new asphalt driveway. I found a reputable company and turned the number and information over to my spouse to handle the bid and set up. He is a great guy but does not handle much of the “house” business; he prefers golf—I understand, we’re retired. But I thought it was time he took charge of some things himself and help me out; so the call was made. After 2 weeks of waiting for a bid, I called the contractor myself to see what was the hold-up as we had a short window of opportunity to get this job done. He was not there when I phoned, so I left him a message to call me back. When he did, we weren’t home. But the message he sent was clearly for Craig and not me. Then the bid came by e-mail—again, for Craig of course. I replied to the e-mail bid with a question and he responded again to Craig. “Hello Craig,” instead of myself. Through all the e-mail transmissions I signed the mail from Carol; he addressed the response to Craig. Am I here? Do I exist? Is this the end of the unfairness? No. Read on.

So as I stated above, I handle most all of the house business. I pay all the bills (we earn the same), I set up our insurances, balance the checkbook, etc. My ol man and I have a deal which he prefers, as long as he can use his ATM for anything he wants or needs he’s happy; I handle the rest. I make the investments that keep up afloat; I even pay the kids tuitions. The hubby rarely has a need to even write a check. Frankly, I doubt he knows where or how much money we have. When I met him he had numerous bills and was regularly late on payments. Since we married nine years ago, those are all paid off and I have successfully showed him how to live well, debt-free. So, where’s the unfairness in all this? We had our credit checked this week. His credit was over 800! I thought that was awesome and assumed because I am the one who handles the money, mine should be better, right? Wrong. Because I am a woman, and ONLY because I am a woman, my credit score was lower. Fair?

Will we ever reach a point where woman is truly equal to man? To this day, a woman with the exact education, GPA, and experience WILL make less money than a man. My only wish is that someday there is equality not only between men and women, but with all of mankind. As always, your comments are welcome.

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4 comments:

Cheryl Moore June 29, 2010 at 5:45 PM  

Wow, Carol. No. That is NOT fair! But it sounds like you have brought the family far. I'm sure blogging about it helps to get it out of your system. I understand. I write in my journals. Try not to grow tired of doing good. Keep up the good work.

--Cheryl Moore
www.databasedesigns4u.blogspot.com

imelda June 30, 2010 at 5:15 AM  

try to talk it out with your man, don't grow tired doing good. it is nice to be humble

Carol June 30, 2010 at 8:35 AM  

Hey Imelda, I'm not mad at MY man, I'm mad at "the man!!"

Anonymous,  June 30, 2010 at 8:04 PM  

that's odd because we have the same deal in our house. I no longer work but my husband does and I handle all the bills, banking etc.. Our bank accounts are joint but except for our mortgage our credit is separate and I have a higher credit score than he does.

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